With all the worry about how people just aren't spending money like they used to, you'd think customer service would be especially good. Fawning, even. Please buy something and I'll throw in a backrub and detail your car before you leave. And can I carry your bags, your children and you to the car?

So why does it seem especially rotten?

Not so much rotten-surly, but rotten-oblivious. People in public-contact sales jobs shouldn't be detached and self-involved. That's for bloggers and politicians.

It's rampant: Sales associates so involved in gossiping together that it seems an imposition to ask them to ring up a sale. Clerks reading novels or doing homework (maybe that's OK in a small boutique, but in a department store?). Customer service reps playing tag around the displays. Customers all but ignored, their requests treated like huge inconveniences. R-rated language flying through the retail floor.

The let-it-all-hang-out vibe of the break room isn't confined to the break room anymore. It's grocery store clerks complaining over their shoulders to other grocery store clerks about how many excruciating minutes until their next break while customers are standing there trying to pretend they can't hear the whining. Gee, if you don't want the job, there's probably somebody out there right now who does.

Contrast reality with the fairytale image in commercials, where salespeople hover helpfully, smile genuinely and look like they believe with all their hearts in the product their selling, like the lady with the red headband in the Progressive car insurance ads. So many times in real life, the clerk taking your money looks at you like you're crazy for buying whatever they're selling. So many times, it seems like you're interrupting their daydream bubbles by asking if you may please make a purchase.

It's to the point where when the customer service is friendly, thoughtful and charming, it's a shock. Wait, did you just offer to HELP me? Whoa. What's the catch?

The days of people having money burning a hole in their pockets or of shoppers unafraid of running up big credit card debt are over. These days, folks are holding tight to their wallets. You'd think it would make those in retail sales more motivated to charm customers into buying stuff.

Lee Cataluna's column runs Tuesdays, Fridays and Sundays. Reach her at 535-8172 or lcataluna@honoluluadvertiser.com.